{"id":507,"date":"2022-07-09T09:31:59","date_gmt":"2022-07-09T07:31:59","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/slickhaven.com\/?p=507"},"modified":"2025-10-17T09:27:15","modified_gmt":"2025-10-17T07:27:15","slug":"story-part-8-the-bloody-monarch","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/slickhaven.com\/en\/story-part-8-the-bloody-monarch\/","title":{"rendered":"Story part 8 \u2013 The Bloody Monarch"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u201cFortune smiles on you. Any sudden disappearance of yours would cause me greater inconvenience than listening to your excuses already does, but know that my patience is limited. Incompetence shall not be tolerated.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Bloody Monarch<\/b> rose from his elevated throne. A couple of steps at his feet sufficiently separated him from all the cretins falling to their knees, but there was nonetheless a certain perverse pleasure in looking down on them. It was also a natural emphasis on his position: at the top stood he, the lord and master absolute. At the bottom, conversely, was a court stonemason who had failed him.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYour Highness, forgive me, what else could I\u2019ve done?\u201d the subject lamented. \u201cThe wall was built as you commanded, and the tree had enough room. Only that, since summer the roots have reached so far they found a gap between the stones and chipped the wall. Things grow fast around here, this is known, but\u2026\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSilence!\u201d the monarch\u2019s roar echoed across the throne room. \u201c\u2018Fast\u2019 is how you better fix that wall, cut down the tree, uproot it and salt the ground. Cut down other trees that grow too close to the walls, so that it won\u2019t happen again. Now get out of my sight!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The mason shuddered and whimpered like a pathetic mongrel reprimanded for disobedience. Bowing down to the point of almost kissing the red carpet, he backed away from the throne while the monarch stood and watched him with a mocking smile. First set of columns, second, third\u2026 yes, even from this distance he could still shoot him dead. Serfs were so easily replaced.<\/span><\/p>\n

One perversion a day, he thought, and let the mason leave the chamber. A bleeding subject would not improve his\u00a0 mood today. Perhaps some fine liquor instead? He seated himself on the throne, grabbed a gilded goblet and took a sip, then sloshed the rest on the steps. Eh. Even the wine didn\u2019t taste right.<\/span><\/p>\n

The wine could not soothe the grief of losing a loved one, and drying stains refused to form any kind of divination that would bring him closer to the murderer. Maybe today was simply meant to be lousy? He will try again tomorrow. He will avenge her eventually, even if it meant spilling all of Slickhaven\u2019s wine, and more than that should a need arise. Scarlet drops sprinkled the castle floors quite regularly, and in many places they had already formed intricate patterns in which the monarch would seek answers to his questions.<\/span><\/p>\n

Sometimes it was the throne room\u2019s floors, and sometimes chambers full of shackles and sharp tools.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThe clown. Bring me the clown,\u201d he demanded. Streams of blood and wine were excellent remedies for the ineptitude of his subjects, but to truly occupy his thoughts, he had to turn to the only man whose actual job was to pretend to be an idiot. In his experience, that man\u2019s single word was worth more than anything uttered by the courtiers claiming to be enlightened. \u201cWhere is <\/span>Royal Jester<\/b>!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Not even a minute passed when a purple-yellow, mottled figure burst into the chamber and skipped forth. A pirouette, a twirl, and finally a forward lunge which ended in a split. The jester took off his four-pointed cap, the bells of which rang merrily as he bowed, and pretended to wipe the steps with it. He then stood up in a springy jump and straightened up. As befitted a court performer, his gestures and movements were theatrical and utmost exaggerated.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGood sir, kind sir, why\u2019s thy face so grim?\u201d he recited. \u201cWhy to worry so intently, whilst thy wine fills every brim?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m afraid, Jester, there isn\u2019t enough wine in the whole wide world to drown all my sorrows and griefs,\u201d the monarch replied. \u201cDon\u2019t bother with the anecdotes, I have no need of them today. I have summoned you here because I wish to know your take on the current affairs troubling the city.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGlad to speak and lend an ear, topics, themes, they matter not.\u201d The jester took a scrap of colored paper from his pocket, rolled it into a cone, and stuck it on the side of his hat. \u201cSpeak, Your Highness, for I do listen, what\u2019s the worry thou have brought?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAs you know, Slickhaven is situated on the edge of the Thornwood forest,\u201d the monarch began. \u201cWhile our people stand for advancements in trade, growing the guilds, and building strong foundations, the forest is ridden with nature worshippers who\u2026 well, do exactly that. We\u2019re building a future for Slickhaven and its citizens, whereas those savages bow before old trees and tend to bushes as if they were their firstborn. Rumor has it they mate with animals, too. Regardless, they would sometimes send their more civilized representatives to meet our people and trade forest goods for tools and other things they needed. We practice our ways, they practice theirs, that\u2019s how it\u2019s been for years, but lately something’s changed.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The jester froze and covered his mouth in a flawless fake shock and disbelief, and the monarch carried on.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s been six months, yet no one has come out to trade since. Moreover, the hunters reported that the dire wolf which usually plagued the farms in the fall didn\u2019t show up either. It had always been gobbling up cattle before winter, but now no one has heard anything in over a month.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThe savage are quiet, and so is the beast,\u201d the jester intoned. \u201cHave the savage become the beast\u2019s own grand feast?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThat was my thought too, but nothing of sort has occurred in years, except the incident with the butcher\u2019s wife,\u201d the monarch replied. \u201cNow this is where it gets interesting. While there\u2019s no activity in the forest, there is more than enough here, within our borders. I\u2019ve just had a visit from the court mason because some tree has grown its roots in such a way it chipped a part of the garden walls. Two weeks ago I was told of a woman who got herself tangled in ivy and almost suffocated to death, although she insisted she did not trip. Someone else had a case of mushroom poisoning when something similar but inedible had suddenly grown among their ceps. And recently, a bush by the stables had developed to such a span I\u2019ve had the gardener cut it down with an axe to let the horses out.\u201d The monarch slammed his fist on the throne. \u201cWhy are things which should stay in the forest happening in my city?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA puzzling matter indeed, yet perhaps not fully unclear,\u201d the jester suggested. \u201cHave thou done anything a forest would consider\u2026 severe?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The monarch snorted. \u201cIf you\u2019re talking about the summer logging, I have no regrets. What, should I cry about it? Be ashamed of what I\u2019ve done? Should I now go and apologize to the savages and their forest spirits? We needed the wood because the city is expanding, the ports need workers and the houses don\u2019t just grow on their own. There was no time to waste, especially not when we have a resource such as Thornwood at our doorstep.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThy logic, my lord: is, was, and forever shall flawless be.\u201d The jester climbed up the throne\u2019s elevation and grabbed the edge of the monarch\u2019s cloak. \u201cBut, say I cut it here. Wouldn\u2019t thou hold it against me?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cMake the damn point already! You mean to tell me that the forest is now revolting because I decided to cut down a couple more trees off-season?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWho dwells in the forest knows the trees can sing loud, but when silence arises, it\u2019s fell omen avowed. Moreso in the city: the ivy, the wall. All that has happened resembles a call. Who hears it must listen, with patience not scorn, for after every silence, there comes a storm.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The jester jumped off the elevation and bowed before leaving. Bloody Monarch furrowed his brow. Now he regretted spilling all that wine.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cFortune smiles on you. Any sudden disappearance of yours would cause me greater inconvenience than listening to your excuses already does, but know that my patience is limited. Incompetence shall not be tolerated.\u201d Bloody Monarch rose from his elevated throne. 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